Hi everyone! Before I start this blog post I thought it would be appropriate to start off with where in fact I have been for 4 months?!! Well I’ll give you the run down, basically my site was pretty poorly for like over a month or so and took me forever to make her healthy again (technical difficulties) and then when she was up and running again I went through a little bit of down fall in my life of bad moods and rejection but I won’t bore you with the details but I didn’t have any inspiration to write anything. Recently, I have been preparing for my A-level exams and haven’t had a spare day until today… so I’m feeling much better now and my exam prep is in fact what has inspired this blog post.
So basically my first A-level exam is in 10 days I’m kind of freaking out but I’m also quite chilled and excited about it, not for the exams but to actually leave college. I can’t wait for the hours and hours of traveling on the bus to and from college every day to stop and don’t even get me started on the long days and early morning get-ups ahhhh the sweet relief of freedom haha.
I’m excited to leave, as soon after I turn 18! and then shortly after I go away to Greece with my boyfriend which is all very exciting and I’m looking forward to it but what happens after that? See I’ve decided the idea of Uni isn’t really for me yeah I guess it would be fun and all but the idea of ANOTHER three years of studying and exams makes me want to jump off a cliff (I know very dramatic not literally though obvs) I would rather go straight into doing something I love like doing a media apprenticeship whilst also getting paid like that sounds amazing to me. But the trouble I have been having is I am finding it really hard to find the ideal apprenticeship for me. Ideally I would love to do a degree apprenticeship with ITV or BBC but they do not offer degrees which Is annoying and I’ve already been rejected from one of them but hey ho got to keep going. So it’s like do I go to Uni and suffer for three years but get a degree which is what I want or do I do an apprenticeship in something that I’m not sure if I will like but get experience and money? It’s honestly so hard to decide and any of you reading that are students may relate to me and my circumstances. It comforts me knowing I’m not the only one going through so much pressure at this age and not entirely knowing what on earth I want to do in my life at 18 years old? My friends are in the same boat though so we are all here for each other, but why is life so hard at such a young age?
For months I have been in this dilemma, what do I want to do with my life? Why do so many people seem to have their life sorted or a plan? If your preparing for your final exams and leaving college right now you may relate to this but do u feel like whenever someone who has all their s**t together talks to you about their plan’s and how excited they are for the future because they have it all figured out whilst your sat there and have no idea what could happen? Yeah I feel you I do. So because of this I’ve been reflecting on my life and I have chosen not to compare my life to others, because everyone progresses at a different rate, not all of us will have our lives figured out right now or in the next 3 years or 10 years even. There shouldn’t be this pressure that just because your 18 and have finished college the next steps should be Uni or a full time job, it doesn’t work like that anymore and it has taken me a while to realise that but we shouldn’t have this constant pressure to conform to these ideas of what we should do at this age. So if you want to take a gap year or volunteer abroad or go travelling or you want to go to Uni or you want to go and do an apprenticeship then go and do that, there is no time limit into when you need to do things whatever makes you happy is the most important thing right now.
So for me I have a boot camp in July for a content producer apprenticeship and if I’m taken on that will be me set for a year and I can gain experience and it will give me knowledge into what I want to do in my life however if I don’t get that then I am either going to take a gap year and go to Canada for a month or so or I could go to Uni… but do I really want to? Honestly I believe everything happens for a reason if I get this apprenticeship then that’s where I’m meant to be for the time being and if not I will go travelling and gain work experience but I no longer will let myself be pressured into doing something I don’t want to do, my happiness comes first and I hope you all will follow your gut and do what you want with your lives because you can do anything you set your mind to! And remember not everyone has a plan some of us are just out here floating taking our time and that’s ok too.
Have a great weekend
All love S x